Damn
by Bekabulwinkle
Summary: Willow's POV on her relationship with a WWE star - bad summary just please read and review


All right we all know I don't own any of the Wrestlers here so don't rub it in. They are the soul property of either themselves or WWE. Plus I do not own any Buffy the Vampire Slayer characters and/or Angel characters used within and I have no legal hold over them in anyway what so ever. The song  
is by LeAnn Rimes called Damn  
  
Title Damn 1/1  
  
Author name Me  
  
Author Email Bekabulwinkle@hotmail.com Category: Drama, angst, romance Pairing Willow/? Spoilers none really  
  
Rating M +15 (I don't know how you all rate it in the US so I'm going for mature - there's nothing really in here to offend  
  
Author's comments This was done quickly, kinda reminds me of Grasshopper (A.K.A. The Undertaker's Muse) Right Kinda of Wrong. I'm not ripping this off but if you feel I am sorry but its all my own work I just got the idea from her/him ..Grasshopper (A.K.A. The Undertaker's Muse) I hope you don't think I am and I hope you like this..(  
  
Side bar - thanks Grasshopper (A.K.A. The Undertaker's Muse) you've gotten me into LeAnn Rimes now and I don't know if I'm happy about that or not..  
  
I choose to start the story now..  
  
He's sitting so close, too close. His smell drifts to my nose and I can't help but breathe that little deeper, it's hard yet soft, deep and masculine that reminds me of warm summer nights back home. I close my eyes and see his face so clear like its been burnt in my memory. His spiky hair surprisingly soft under her fingers as they messed it even more. Expressive eyes that never missed a detail, eyes that said so much more than his lips but lips that could make her moan and gasp as they left there mark on her body. Her mind was pulled for its daydream as surprisingly elegant hands, long fingered, capable of great gentleness and great violence rand across her bear arm skimming the curve of her breast making her eyes widen and her teeth to wrestle with her lower lip trying hard not to make a sound as he just looked smug and shifted in his seat acting like nothing had happened.  
  
~ There you go again when you  
  
Rub up against my skin  
  
I have to catch my breath  
  
I begin to sweat, oh ~  
  
Her body shivers and she squirms as he retraces his movements, and she curses that he knows her so well. Her life so changed from the mousy little girl she had once been, the sidekick who lived in the shadows and he had changed it. His strength was tempered with an odd gentle protectiveness that she had needed when she first started, the broken girl who fighting was a way of life, it wasn't for entertainment or fun when she fought it was for life and the company couldn't use her like that. So that's when he came into her life and made her feel beautiful. Made her feel powerful and able to stand alone, she had been his protégée and him her teacher. He had shown her how to fly, he had shown her how to ground a five hundred pound man, and he had shown her how to work the crowd and a story but most of all he had shown her how to love.  
  
~ Lips tracing down my neck  
  
And it's scaring me to death  
  
How'd you learn  
  
To draw me to the cliff  
  
Just to push me off  
  
Just to push me off the edge ~  
  
Lover. Its such a strange words really, lover, mistress, partner, student they were all words for her yet they weren't. He had made her stand on her own two feet and she had brought him back from the brink, that darkness which was going to swallow him once more. She knew it, he had told her in those soft moments after their worlds exploded together, when his arms were around her and she was able to snuggle close to him. It wasn't right they both knew it, but they couldn't stop it. Somewhere on the roller coaster ride that was them she had fallen for him. Fallen for the man behind the ledged, behind the hard exterior, looked beyond the mask of tattoos and gruffness and found the loving sweet man under it and she had was caught hook line and sinker.  
  
~ Damn, I hate the way  
  
You know me, and  
  
Damn, you kill me  
  
When you hold me  
  
Like I'm your world  
  
Like this won't hurt  
  
Like a favourite curse  
  
Hitting every nerve ~  
  
I sit away from the crowd of smiling laughing people because there he is, I cant be near him without wanting to touch him, without running her hands over that smooth skin, feeling the muscles move under her touch and see that smile he reserved for her, but she couldn't because there one was. The other woman, the one who got to him first, his wife. She was wrapped so tight around him as they laughed and joked with everyone else making tears prick against her green eyes. She couldn't help it, it was like a part of her was dying every time he went back to her, every time he came to her, and every sweet word he murmured to her was like a knife in her heart as she watched them. After Oz she had thought she couldn't love anyone again, then came Tara, and there love was suppose to be eternal but death took her and left Willow standing on earth crying and torn vowing she would never love again but now, right that second she knew the love she felt for Oz, the love she felt for Tara was nothing compared to how much she loved the man across the room. He was an addiction, her addiction that made her stay, that made her keep their relationship a secrete, that made her want him.  
  
~ Damn, I'm fighting and  
  
I'm losing and  
  
Damn you, you're pullin'  
  
And I'm pushin'  
  
I'm wrestlin' with,  
  
I toss and twist  
  
Till finally I give in  
  
Damn' ~  
  
I'm selfish I know but I want him all to myself - I want to wake up in his arms, I want to kiss him and not worry what others will think. I want to hold him close and.who is she kidding she would never have those things. He could never give her those things except in the small hotel room they lived their love in. Those few days a week when he was all hers, in those nights when she watched him sleep or held him close wondering if that was the last time she would ever get to touch him, get to kiss him, get to love him. She was sure he could see right though her, see all her fears and read her soul, it was in those times of worry and near disappear that his body, his mouth, his lips, his tongue, his hands, fingers his words, his eyes with his soul he would make love to her, he would bathe her in him. His much larger body swallowing her in warmth and protection, dominance tempered with submission and make her addicted all over again  
  
~ I hate being addicted, only  
  
You would have predicted that  
  
I'd be torn and worn so thin  
  
You can see right through  
  
You can see right through my soul ~  
  
Safe in his arms she closes her eyes on that mark, the reminder that he's not her. Her red hair splayed over his chest as she can hear his heart beat, as she murmurs to herself building the strength she needs to get up and walk away. Knowing soon she would have to get dressed and leave him - leave the warmth of the bed they had just made love in. Leave another part of her behind. "You better." His voice is croaky as he shifts under her, a sign she knows means get up. Moving off him Willow silently sighs, running a hand through her red hair as she finds her clothes, clothes that had been torn off in passion, forgoing her bra and panties she pulls her jeans on and tugs her shirt across her naked form, shaking hands buttoning the first few before she heads towards the door "Willow." He whispers into the dark making her steps falter hoping that maybe he would say something to her but she hears the ruffling of the bed, after a few moments she hears the bathroom door shut and the shower run. The tears prick at her eyes again as she closed the door behind her, leaning against it her knees feel weak and her body shakes from the sob pushing its way though her but she keeps going, moving away from the door holding the man she loves, heading back to her own room once again cursing him for knowing her so well  
  
~ Damn, I hate the way  
  
You know me, and  
  
Damn, you kill me  
  
When you hold me  
  
Like I'm your world  
  
Like this won't hurt  
  
Like a favourite curse  
  
Hitting every nerve~  
  
The room is quite, she hates the quite it gives her too much time to think, to stew, to wonder what it was all about. The tears come, and come and they flood her all over again as she curls around herself - that warmth and love she had been give was gone and it had sapped her whole body. Leaning up against the door of her room her head lent on her pulled up knees as she weeps, her heart breaking all over again, and she curses herself, calling herself all kinds of names. Anger soon overpowering the grief, the heart wrenching pain she knew to well. The first glass shatters against the wall as the room fills with an ear-splitting wail and then more glass shatters as she throws it across the room. By the end of it everything that could be broken was, her long dormant magic all but destroying the well-designed room. The dress is up turned, the sheets pulled from the bed and torn to shreds, every glass, lamp and breakable had been hurled against the wall - the glass doors shattered and half hanging in there places as she falls to her knees racking as she wept all the while knowing she had lost the fight and would once again return to his side whenever he wanted.  
  
~ Damn, I'm fighting and  
  
I'm losing and  
  
Damn you, you're pullin'  
  
And I'm pushin'  
  
I'm wrestlin' with,  
  
I toss and twist  
  
Till finally I give in  
  
Damn ~  
  
The banging on the door roused her from her pain-induced stupor, frighten and unsure eyes see the damage for the first time, her hands bleeding and her throat hoarse from her screaming "Willow! - Red what's going on" Glenn yells, the worry in his voice makes her weary and tired "Red speak to me - Please, let me in" He's yelling but she couldn't move, couldn't speak to reassure him so she just stands there "Willow I'm going to get." The voice fades out as she just stands there shivering, flicking a hand making the room straight again all sign of her break down gone except for the tears still falling. Absently she thought she should be out of tears by now "Willow?" His accented voice asks as he pushes the door open keeping his friends behind him just in case, worried and scared his heart pounding in his chest as he walks through the room surprised to se it so clean, Glenn had begged him to come saying it sounded like hell had broken lose. It wasn't until his green eyes fell on the woman that he knew hell had broken lose just it was inside her "Willow. Sweetheart" He called reaching out and hugging her, pulling her close to him body marvelling at how well she fitted into him  
  
~I get reckless, scared, confused  
  
I feel desperate so for you  
  
And you know it, you know it  
  
You know it yes you do~  
  
Those arms, she knew them. She knew how they felt around her, knew every inch of them, and knew every story behind the tattoos adorning them. Being turned she looked up knowing the face looking down at her more than the one she saw staring back at her in the mirror each morning. "Baby, baby what's wrong" Her eyes searched his for a moment trying to find something to keep her with him, but the feel of that ring against her body, the tattoo proudly displayed across his neck made her choice for her "I can't.I can't do this anymore" Willow whispered pushing away from him, back into the coldness of reality "Will - baby what do you mean? - Why?" Lifting a shaking hand she cupped the side of his face, reverently sliding her thumb over his high cheekbones dipping across his jaw and then tracing the full lips she loved so much before speaking "What about Sara?" She saw him frown for a second then once again she was pulled into his arms. "But I love you" Mark murmurs against her, his lips softly kissing her hair as he gently lifts her in his arms and carried her to her bed, delicately putting her in the middle of it before once again his warm arms were holding her close  
  
~ Baby I give in  
  
Damn ~  
  
Ok so if you didn't get it was Willow and Mark Calloway - Undertaker - I know it's a weird pairing but I felt it and remember it was done quickly so I hope you liked it..beka 


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